Early Morning
I got up early. I woke early and could get back to sleep. It's the trouble with going to bed early. I went jogging at 6am, just as the sun was coming up. It rained. It had already started as I was leaving, but I thought, hoped, it would stop. It got heavier. I pulled my hoodie over my head, to keep my head phones dry.
By the time I got home, it had stopped. And I was freezing. I stood in front of the fire in the lounge. Bruno licked the sweat off my legs. It tickled.
I was just drying my hair with a towel when there was a knock at the back door, it was my neighbour Beth.
“You been jogging in the rain again?”
“Yeah, well, gotta do what ya gotta do.”
“It will lead to no good,” said Beth. “I’ve told you before. Pneumonia and death not long after.”
“I’ve got to keep it all trim,” I said. “I never know when I have to use it.”
“Meditation,” said Beth. “I’ve told you before. To much emphasis on,” she looked at my crotch, “ya thing…”
“Beth!” I laughed.
“Empty vessel, Joshy boy, empty vessel. You just end up chasing it around and your never ending wants leave you unfulfilled.” Beth’s right eye ticked, like she was winking at me. “Ends up driving you nuts.” She ticked uncontrollably for a few seconds.
“Jogging is my meditation…”
“False god, Josh my boy, false god…”
“It is when I relax…”
Beth held her hands out in front of her like she was holding the entire world in her hands. “You think,” emphasis on the think, as she pulled the world towards herself, “you are relaxing, but you’re not.
“But, I am.”
“No Josh, no Josh. You are still feeding your ego. You are doing it all for the wrong reasons.”
“The wrong reasons?” I pretty much knew what the answer to this was, why I asked I don’t know.
“You want to be discovering inner peace, not outward beauty.” Beth’s shoulder rotated quite unexpectedly. “Inner peace, Josh, not outward beauty.” She flattened her palms and slid them threw the air in front of her. “Sanctuary is inside everyone of us, we just have to take the time to look for it.”
“Would you like a coffee, Beth?”
“The devils brew, Josh, the devil’s brew.”
“Well, I was just about to have one.”
“Lemons,” Beth suddenly said. “I want lemons.”
I glanced over at the fruit bowl to see a number of the yellow fruit hiding amongst the mandarins. “Help yourself.”
“You are a prince, Josh, a prince,” said Beth. “What would I do without you?”
“What would I do without you, Beth?”
She stepped with one foot, and kind of slid the other one behind the first, right up next to me. “You are not moving, are you Josh.
“No.”
“You wouldn’t move on me, would you Josh?”
“No plans to, Beth.”
She glanced around, I am not sure why, then looked back at me. “Good.” She looked at the fruit bowl and talked while still gazing at it. “I’m not sure if I could cope if you moved, Josh. Pippa and Joe and Tommy either.” She looked at me. “You still banging that boy?”
“Tommy?”
“Tommy.”
“No,” I said. “Not for some time.
“Nor Rob and Sally,” Beth reached out to the fruit bowl and picked out three lemons, one by one. “Rob and Sally aren’t moving, are they?”
“Not that I know of, Beth.”
“I don’t want Rob and Sally to move either.”
“I haven’t heard.”
She had investigated the lemons as we spoke and she put one of them back in the fruit bowl and chose another. She looked at me. She grimaced. “It had a blemish, you don’t mind, do you?”
“Whatever lemons you like, Beth.”
“You’re kind, Josh, very kind,” said Beth. “You will always be alright because you are kind.”
“Thanks, Beth.”
“Gotta go. I’ll find that mediation book, for beginners,” she laughed. She took hold of the back door knob. “For dummies.” She cackled. She disappeared through the door. I turned towards the coffee machine and pushed the button to turn it on.
“Ah Josh…”
I turned to see Beth in the doorway again. “I didn’t mean you were a dummy, Josh. I didn’t mean that at all.”
The coffee machine whirred. “No problem, Beth.”
She smiled. She twitched. Then she was gone.
By the time I got home, it had stopped. And I was freezing. I stood in front of the fire in the lounge. Bruno licked the sweat off my legs. It tickled.
I was just drying my hair with a towel when there was a knock at the back door, it was my neighbour Beth.
“You been jogging in the rain again?”
“Yeah, well, gotta do what ya gotta do.”
“It will lead to no good,” said Beth. “I’ve told you before. Pneumonia and death not long after.”
“I’ve got to keep it all trim,” I said. “I never know when I have to use it.”
“Meditation,” said Beth. “I’ve told you before. To much emphasis on,” she looked at my crotch, “ya thing…”
“Beth!” I laughed.
“Empty vessel, Joshy boy, empty vessel. You just end up chasing it around and your never ending wants leave you unfulfilled.” Beth’s right eye ticked, like she was winking at me. “Ends up driving you nuts.” She ticked uncontrollably for a few seconds.
“Jogging is my meditation…”
“False god, Josh my boy, false god…”
“It is when I relax…”
Beth held her hands out in front of her like she was holding the entire world in her hands. “You think,” emphasis on the think, as she pulled the world towards herself, “you are relaxing, but you’re not.
“But, I am.”
“No Josh, no Josh. You are still feeding your ego. You are doing it all for the wrong reasons.”
“The wrong reasons?” I pretty much knew what the answer to this was, why I asked I don’t know.
“You want to be discovering inner peace, not outward beauty.” Beth’s shoulder rotated quite unexpectedly. “Inner peace, Josh, not outward beauty.” She flattened her palms and slid them threw the air in front of her. “Sanctuary is inside everyone of us, we just have to take the time to look for it.”
“Would you like a coffee, Beth?”
“The devils brew, Josh, the devil’s brew.”
“Well, I was just about to have one.”
“Lemons,” Beth suddenly said. “I want lemons.”
I glanced over at the fruit bowl to see a number of the yellow fruit hiding amongst the mandarins. “Help yourself.”
“You are a prince, Josh, a prince,” said Beth. “What would I do without you?”
“What would I do without you, Beth?”
She stepped with one foot, and kind of slid the other one behind the first, right up next to me. “You are not moving, are you Josh.
“No.”
“You wouldn’t move on me, would you Josh?”
“No plans to, Beth.”
She glanced around, I am not sure why, then looked back at me. “Good.” She looked at the fruit bowl and talked while still gazing at it. “I’m not sure if I could cope if you moved, Josh. Pippa and Joe and Tommy either.” She looked at me. “You still banging that boy?”
“Tommy?”
“Tommy.”
“No,” I said. “Not for some time.
“Nor Rob and Sally,” Beth reached out to the fruit bowl and picked out three lemons, one by one. “Rob and Sally aren’t moving, are they?”
“Not that I know of, Beth.”
“I don’t want Rob and Sally to move either.”
“I haven’t heard.”
She had investigated the lemons as we spoke and she put one of them back in the fruit bowl and chose another. She looked at me. She grimaced. “It had a blemish, you don’t mind, do you?”
“Whatever lemons you like, Beth.”
“You’re kind, Josh, very kind,” said Beth. “You will always be alright because you are kind.”
“Thanks, Beth.”
“Gotta go. I’ll find that mediation book, for beginners,” she laughed. She took hold of the back door knob. “For dummies.” She cackled. She disappeared through the door. I turned towards the coffee machine and pushed the button to turn it on.
“Ah Josh…”
I turned to see Beth in the doorway again. “I didn’t mean you were a dummy, Josh. I didn’t mean that at all.”
The coffee machine whirred. “No problem, Beth.”
She smiled. She twitched. Then she was gone.
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