Xmas Lunch
Today is just a day to get stoned, except we have to go to the big family party. Just because Amanda and Rick have managed to flee the city, it doesn’t mean that Daniel and I get out of it. There’s a family “Do” in Warrendyte.
Daniel and I argued - we had discussions - about which car to drive, in other words who was the designated driver, thus determining who could dink, or sneak down to the creek to smoke a splif.
I lost, so we headed out to the country in the Golf. As we approached the Burke Road turn off, the traffic on the freeway steady got thicker and then came grinding to a halt, right at the exit, so we took it.
The house is kind of nice, set on a long bush block, finishing with actual river frontage (in real estate agents terminology) on the Yarra.
Everyone was seated in the first court yard, around a seriously ravaged entrée plate, when we got there. We were the last to arrive, so all eyes turned to the both of us.
Daniel and I are now a part of the young parent generation, who are all breeding, unlike us. Daniel was asked about his lack of fatherhood but I wasn't. Actually, one of the cousins has had 5 children so she skews the baby making stats. Actually, there are a couple of "two children" but the majority have only had one child.
There are a lot of girls, but there are also a few new Grant boys growing up. The “beautiful” baby is now quite a little boy with long dark hair that flies as he throws the basketball through the hoop. The young girls milled about inside, the young boys ran about outside.
I was asked my opinion on marriage, which I responded to by saying I really didn't give a shit, and mostly what I got in return was disapproval for my opinion They are seem to be outrage, quietly demanding equality for everyone. I assume it is the one topic on which "they" can relate.
I got a calendar. What does one do with calendars now a days? It is a bit like giving somebody a fax machine. Daniel and I didn't take any presents for anyone, under Amanda's sage-like advice.
"You don't need to buy anyone anything, just make an appearance and represent our family. Do I really need to tell you how to do these things?"
I am assuming the calendar was for both of us.
There was an enormous amount of food laid out, followed by an equally large amount of desert. We all queued obediently for both courses, some how the "youngest kids" managed to get in first in both lines, holding it up noticeably while they asked multiple questions and made multiple demands of their parents.
There was a lot of sport/social references from a different part of the world from where I lived, coming from the boy partners of the girl cousins. They all seemed to be making a huge effort trying very hard to fit right in seamlessly. The "actual" cousins just took up where they'd left off the last time we'd seen each other, except now my hetro cousins had quite clearly been catching up more often than they ever used to now they had kids. There is only one other boy cousin, other than Daniel and I, a strapping red-haired lad who just gets better looking, and cooler, as the years pass. Boy cousin number 4 went nuts and now doesn't come to family gatherings, at all and he is spoken about in hushed tones, as though we are ashamed, or should be.
We left at 5pm. Neither having imbibed in any form of relaxative therapy, drinking or smoking, sober as judges – if you don’t count the doobie the late 20s early, 30s boy cousins shared when Daniel and I first got there – as the sun shone down gloriously in the late afternoon. Sometimes it is nice to dip your toe into suburban outback. It is also nice to leave.
We’d done our duty, we hadn’t embarrassed anyone, namely Amanda. Rick doesn’t give a shit. “Say what you like, what the hell do I care.” Rick has some what of an existentialist mentality. "What the hell does it matter, nothing is important."
Daniel and I argued - we had discussions - about which car to drive, in other words who was the designated driver, thus determining who could dink, or sneak down to the creek to smoke a splif.
I lost, so we headed out to the country in the Golf. As we approached the Burke Road turn off, the traffic on the freeway steady got thicker and then came grinding to a halt, right at the exit, so we took it.
The house is kind of nice, set on a long bush block, finishing with actual river frontage (in real estate agents terminology) on the Yarra.
Everyone was seated in the first court yard, around a seriously ravaged entrée plate, when we got there. We were the last to arrive, so all eyes turned to the both of us.
Daniel and I are now a part of the young parent generation, who are all breeding, unlike us. Daniel was asked about his lack of fatherhood but I wasn't. Actually, one of the cousins has had 5 children so she skews the baby making stats. Actually, there are a couple of "two children" but the majority have only had one child.
There are a lot of girls, but there are also a few new Grant boys growing up. The “beautiful” baby is now quite a little boy with long dark hair that flies as he throws the basketball through the hoop. The young girls milled about inside, the young boys ran about outside.
I was asked my opinion on marriage, which I responded to by saying I really didn't give a shit, and mostly what I got in return was disapproval for my opinion They are seem to be outrage, quietly demanding equality for everyone. I assume it is the one topic on which "they" can relate.
I got a calendar. What does one do with calendars now a days? It is a bit like giving somebody a fax machine. Daniel and I didn't take any presents for anyone, under Amanda's sage-like advice.
"You don't need to buy anyone anything, just make an appearance and represent our family. Do I really need to tell you how to do these things?"
I am assuming the calendar was for both of us.
There was an enormous amount of food laid out, followed by an equally large amount of desert. We all queued obediently for both courses, some how the "youngest kids" managed to get in first in both lines, holding it up noticeably while they asked multiple questions and made multiple demands of their parents.
There was a lot of sport/social references from a different part of the world from where I lived, coming from the boy partners of the girl cousins. They all seemed to be making a huge effort trying very hard to fit right in seamlessly. The "actual" cousins just took up where they'd left off the last time we'd seen each other, except now my hetro cousins had quite clearly been catching up more often than they ever used to now they had kids. There is only one other boy cousin, other than Daniel and I, a strapping red-haired lad who just gets better looking, and cooler, as the years pass. Boy cousin number 4 went nuts and now doesn't come to family gatherings, at all and he is spoken about in hushed tones, as though we are ashamed, or should be.
We left at 5pm. Neither having imbibed in any form of relaxative therapy, drinking or smoking, sober as judges – if you don’t count the doobie the late 20s early, 30s boy cousins shared when Daniel and I first got there – as the sun shone down gloriously in the late afternoon. Sometimes it is nice to dip your toe into suburban outback. It is also nice to leave.
We’d done our duty, we hadn’t embarrassed anyone, namely Amanda. Rick doesn’t give a shit. “Say what you like, what the hell do I care.” Rick has some what of an existentialist mentality. "What the hell does it matter, nothing is important."
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