Living In The Real World

Beth was sitting at my kitchen table watching me make us coffee.

“How people pretend they live their lives in public,” said Beth. “But it doesn't match what they do in private.” 

“If we were all honest and admitted to our sexual proclivities,” I said. “the world would be a less uptight place to live.”

“I'm sure of this,” said Beth.

“People are stressed not by what they did, but by what they are hiding,” I said. “It takes a lot of effort to remember all the lies they tell.”

“I haven’t seen so many of your sexual proclivities coming and going from here, just lately,” said Beth.

“Do you spy on my, Beth?”

“You know I do,” said Beth. That sentence would be a funny line coming out of anyone else’s mouth.

“I guess I do,” I said.

“You know I like to keep an eye on what is going on,” said Beth. “It helps me sleep at night.”

“Not so many proclivities, you say.”

“Not since young Matthew has appeared on the scene.”

“I guess.”

“You must like him?”

“I guess,” I said. I thought about Matthew. “Yes, I do.”

“It’s nice Josh,” said Beth. “He’s nice.”

“He is.”

“He’s nice to me,” said Beth. “He doesn’t treat me like a looney.”

I put the two cups of coffee down on the table in front of Beth.

“I have a case of a couple divorcing at the moment, because I had a wife who thought she was happily married,

“Poor girl.”

“Believed in it, 

“It’s why I keep to myself.

“Was certain she’d be with her husband for the rest of her life, 

“Heart ache.”

“While he was continuing consecutive affairs with every personal assistant he ever had.”

“They should cut it off.”

“Who?”

“I dunno Josh,” said Beth. “The tackle wacker.”

“Whacker?”

“Slasher.” Beth shrugged.

“Would that be an official position?”

“It would be if I was in power,” said Beth.

“It was a prerequisite that the candidates would fuck him to get the job.”

“See, that’s what I’m talkin’ about Josh,” said Beth. “The real world. It sucks.”

“Is that what we were talking about?”

Beth laughed “It is now.”

I drank my coffee.

“Hey Josh.”

“Yes.”

“You didn’t ask me what?”

“What?”

“You asked me who?”

“Huh?”

“You didn’t ask me what we should cut off.” Beth started to laugh.

“No. I asked who would do it.”

“You knew what was to be cut off.”

“Yes.”

Beth laughed some more. “That is finny Josh.”

I started to laugh just because Beth thought it was funny. Infectious laughter, there should be more of it in the real world.